六人行(老友记)第一季第一集对白中英文对照.doc

101TheOneWhereMonicaGetsaNewRoommate(ThePilot-TheUncutVersion)

[Scene:CentralPerk,Chandler,Joey,Phoebe,andMonicaarethere.]
Monica:There'snothingtotell!He'sjustsomeguyIworkwith!
Joey:Comeon,you'regoingoutwiththeguy!There'sgottabesomethingwrongwithhim!
Chandler:AllrightJoey,benice.Sodoeshehaveahump?Ahumpandahairpiece?
Phoebe:Wait,doesheeatchalk?
(Theyallstare,bemused.)
Phoebe:Just,'cause,Idon'twanthertogothroughwhatIwentthroughwithCarl-oh!
Monica:Okay,everybodyrelax.Thisisnotevenadate.It'sjusttwopeoplegoingouttodinnerand-nothavingsex.
Chandler:Soundslikeadatetome.
[TimeLapse]
Chandler:Alright,soI'mbackinhighschool,I'mstandinginthemiddleofthecafeteria,andIrealizeIamtotallynaked.
All:Oh,yeah.Hadthatdream.
Chandler:ThenIlookdown,andIrealizethere'saphone...there.
Joey:Insteadof...?
Chandler:That'sright.
Joey:Neverhadthatdream.
Phoebe:No.
Chandler:Allofasudden,thephonestartstoring.NowIdon'tknowwhattodo,everybodystartslookingatme.
Monica:Andtheyweren'tlookingatyoubefore?!
Chandler:Finally,IfigureI'dbetteranswerit,anditturnsoutit'smymother,whichisvery-veryweird,because-shenevercallsme!
[TimeLapse,Rosshasentered.]
Ross:(mortified)Hi.
Joey:Thisguysayshello,Iwannakillmyself.
Monica:Areyouokay,sweetie?
Ross:Ijustfeellikesomeonereacheddownmythroat,grabbedmysmallintestine,pulleditoutofmymouthandtieditaroundmyneck...
Chandler:Cookie?
Monica:(explainingtotheothers)Carolmovedherstuffouttoday.
Joey:Ohh.
Monica:(toRoss)Letmegetyousomecoffee.
Ross:Thanks.
Phoebe:Ooh!Oh!(ShestartstopluckattheairjustinfrontofRoss.)
Ross:No,nodon't!Stopcleansingmyaura!No,justleavemyauraalone,okay?
Phoebe:Fine!Bemurky!
Ross:I'llbefine,alright?Really,everyone.Ihopeshe'llbeveryhappy.
Monica:Noyoudon't.
Ross:NoIdon't,tohellwithher,sheleftme!
Joey:Andyouneverknewshewasalesbian...
Ross:No!!Okay?!Whydoeseveryonekeepfixatingonthat?Shedidn'tknow,howshouldIknow?
Chandler:SometimesIwishIwasalesbian...(Theyallstareathim.)DidIsaythatoutloud?
Ross:Itoldmomanddadlastnight,theyseemedtotakeitprettywell.
Monica:Ohreally,so